I have Boys! Three of them. Talented, handsome, interesting, loving boys. Well, they are men now, of course.
The oldest, BossBoy, is a talented artist, musician, sportsman and deep thinker.
The middle one, BerlinBoy, is a traveller, talented web designer, sportsman and deep thinker.
The youngest, BabyBoy, is a student teacher, talented musician, sportsman, miniature painter and a deep thinker.
They have much in common but they are also individuals and very much their own people. I love them all and they have all been through a lot, having lost their father to cancer 7 years ago. Each has been a great support to me but the youngest one, for a time, carried me through the hardest times. This was due to the older two living overseas for quite a long period after Adrian’s death and also, BabyBoy, being the only one actually still living at home during the last few years of Adrian’s life. There is an 8 year and 6 year gap between BabyBoy and his brothers, this meant he was completing his high school years during his father’s final years and was in fact only 6 years old when his father was first diagnosed with Sarcoma. Today, BabyBoy turns 25. So really this post is about him and what a great young man he is.
25 years ago, when we had all but given up trying to add to our family of 4, along came a gorgeous dark haired, dark eyed little boy, who his father was convinced was going to be a little girl! But I always knew deep down in my heart that this surprise bundle of joy would be another boy and I was happy about that! He arrived in our lives during a period of disruption and turmoil, which had been caused by a job loss and the necessity to move house. He was a blessed distraction and was much loved by us all, especially his father who was not as busy career-wise as he had been when the other boys were born.
BabyBoy spent the majority of his early years in the car!! That seems to be the way of life for third children, especially if there is a significant age gap. Travelling to and from his brothers school activities and after school activities, he quickly became a happy, social little guy. He was loved by all that met him and still is. As a toddler, he would happily amuse himself with his toys or would strive to join in with his big brother’s games in the backyard, playing footy and cricket.
He had a love for Star Wars (before he should have), Lego (which he shoved up his nose one afternoon when his brother had to swim in the state swimming finals) and his musical tastes were Nirvana and other inappropriate bands for a preschooler!
During Primary School he wasn’t the best at everything but he had a great ability to include people and make them feel important. He was well liked by his teachers and fellow schoolmates and at the same time, he was loved by all his brothers College mates – fitting in easily wherever he was. He was so ready for College, when he got there, having been so completely at home due to his brothers attendance before him. His last years at school were difficult, because by this time, his Dad was terminally ill. Not only was BabyBoy carrying a full academic, sporting and music load – he was also often called upon by his Dad to help out around the home, doing handyman work that his weakening father could no longer do. And I’m sure I relied on him for support when times got tough. When visitors, including BossBoy & BerlinBoy(who were living out of home by this time) came to see Adrian, he would brighten up and rally for the visits but it was only BabyBoy and me that saw the full extent of the exhaustion and pain that happened when we were home alone. It must have been extremely hard for him to see. I felt that he was so tuned into my needs that at times he forgot about his own needs.
After Adrian’s death, all the Boys travelled to Europe for different periods of time. BossBoy was gone for 2 years, BerlinBoy never really came home – permanently, but BabyBoy travelled for a few months then returned to think about what he wanted to do with his life. He had missed out on learning to drive due to his father’s illness and his mother’s anxiety. He didn’t really know what he wanted to study at University but was fiercely independent and responsible. He worked in hospitality and customer service and was really good at it. He was the first of his brothers to own a car and had lived out of home since he left school at 17.
BabyBoy has an amazing capacity to converse with people where they are at. He’s a lot like his Dad in that way but I actually think he is better at it than his Dad was. He transcends the normal groups of geek or jock or arts dude! He fits into all or any of those groups, much to their surprise! In his own words (his tongue firmly in his cheek) the geeks can’t work me out because I’m a geek but I’m too good looking to really be a geek!!
He’s a great bloke and an amazing babysitter! He plays drums in a psychedelic rock band.
He works part time as a support worker for kids with special needs. He is studying to be a Secondary School teacher. He is a gamer, who paints models and creates terrain like no one I’ve ever seen before.
He has the best sense of humour and is so much fun to be around. He gives the best hugs of anyone I have ever hugged.
For 25 years I have loved watching him grow and develop into the amazing man he has become. His father would be so proud of everything he is and does. I am so proud of everything he is and does! Thank you for all you do for me, BabyBoy and I love you!
Happy 25th Birthday BabyBoy!